Turks and Caicos

Population: Beach boys and big booties.
Located: Near Jamaica.
Known for: Being near Jamaica.

Remember the movie "How Stella Got Her Groove Back"? Attractive middle aged black female finds herself an economic success but romantic failure in San Francisco. She is encouraged by Whoopi Goldberg, that bizzare-on-the-eyeball fusion of negroid and Jew, to take a deserved break to Jamaica. There she fucks a man 20 years her junior, and consequently gets her 'groove back'.

This movie is representative of a growing trend - female sex tourism (fst). Usually, however, the protagonists aren't attractive, successful or black. They are white and they travel to the worlds poorer regions to pursue that mythical black cock.

Jamaica is the world's number one fst destination. The islands of Turks and Caicos are a British colony formed when Jamaica gained independence. I feel sorry for the men of Turks and Caicos as they must feel the wobbly brunt of middle England's unstimulated spinsters, while the poorer carbon copies in Jamaica get the Swedes and the Yanks and the other, less systematically disgusting, needy vaginas.

The men utilised in fst are globally known as 'Beach Boys'. This is because they typically work menial jobs on the beaches which vie with black wang as the primary reason single cold females choose tropical, negro infested, destinations. They either work on the beach or hang out on the beach, and they are muscular and they say the right things. The female, for her part, is comparatively wealthy. She is willing to buy dinner and breakfast. She is willing to leave donations.

She is, effectively, paying for sex. The guys are inexplicit prostitutes. The girls are johns, though they can tell themselves otherwise. They can pretend that what occurred was romance. That the guy really liked her. He told her he did, he told her she was beautiful. He said, "baby I like your butt". He said, "hmmm damn I need to get me some of that white pussy".

He does. And she discovers that the majority of black cocks are the same as white cocks. And that the beach boys are narcissists who skip foreplay. Everyone with muscles is a foreplay skipping narcissist, a theory I have developed that reinforces my personal image and keeps my lazy limbs out of gymnasiums.

In the morning she pays for breakfast, she pays for lunch, she pays for eveything. It makes sense, she is from the rich white world. When she leaves he asks her for rent money, it's due and he can't pay.

Why not, she thinks. For her it's a pittance and she couldn't bear to see him on the streets. The streets are dirt. Her lover would begin a downward spiral. The better beach boys convince the girls to help them get to the western world.

This happens to Stella. Stella and her husband live happily ever after. How Stella Got Her Groove Back is based on a book written by Terry McMillan, which was in turn based on the authors actual experience. She went to Jamaica and met a beach boy named Jonathon Plummer. They married, they made a book and a movie. A world of fst's were inspired. He was 20 years her junior, a young, virile black stallion.

In 2004 Plummer told McMillan he was gay. The year after they divorced. He had his papers and half her fortune. She had been getting fucked without foreplay by a homo for the last 6 years.

He wasn't a prostitute, though...